You Can't Always Get What You Want
But if you try sometimes, you just might find, you get what you need. The Rolling Stones have the right idea there. I finally had the guts to talk to Elena last night and although a lot of the conversation is fuzzy because it kept going back and forth, in the end, I think it ended OK. I feel a lot better, which is good. I got everything off my chest, let her know just how I feel and what I want for our relationship and she expressed her feelings. It didn�t come exactly how I wanted it to, but I think it came out just fine.
Basically, it boils down to this in all its simplicity, if it�s meant to be, it will be. That�s actually part of a quote in her AOL profile. I said I could agree with that, but it�s not going to stop me from wanting it to be with all my heart and soul, and then she said that was fine, because the whole quote goes something like this: �If it�s meant to be, it will be. But that doesn�t mean you shouldn�t hope, wish, pray and dream for it to be.� So I said I was going to hope, wish, pray and dream with all my might and she said she would too, and that made me happy.
So, who knows what the future holds? No one does. I don�t, she doesn�t, so we�re just going to have to give a shot and see what happens. We can�t make any guarantees and we can�t force something to work that�s just not going to happen. But in the meantime, I really really really really want it to happen and I�m going to do everything in my power to make it so. Enough said.
Got my passport stuff in the works yesterday so that I can go and visit Elena. Not sure when I�m going to have a chance to go, but as often as possible and she said I have an open invitation, which is nice. I also went to the DMV on Monday to get my New York license back; I�ve been carrying around my Louisiana license for a year, so I was without a photo ID yesterday at the post office�s passport office. I had to ask my mom to come down and sign an affidavit saying that I was who I claimed I was. In 4-6 weeks I should have my passport and I can freely leave the country. Woo hoo.
So that�s about it. I feel a lot better now that I got everything off my chest and out in the open. Everything between us isn�t definite, but I think I�m OK with that. For all I know, if she wasn�t going we could break up in a few months time. I doubt it, but it could happen. So, I�m hoping, wishing, praying and dreaming for the best, and that�s all I can do.
Current music � The Rolling Stones �Sympathy for the Devil�