Everybody Knows That You Are Insane
Thats the title of a great Queens of the Stone Age song, in case you're curious. Maybe I should make that a new theme of mine, titles of entries after song titles? Grey's Anatomy does it with episode titles, so why not? We'll see how it goes. I see it being a sporadic thing.
Anyway, to the point of the title. The "You" I'm talking about, is a collective "You," and that collective "You" consists of my parents, my brother, his fiance and her parents. Why? I can hear you asking. Because they just are. Example. Their wedding is officially 369 days away, thats a year, with 4 days to spare. My brother and his fiance are crazy because they went and registered for gifts already at Macy's and Williams-Sonoma. That would be bad enough, as I think there is plenty of time to do all that stuff. Plus, the sheer amount of stuff they registered for is crazy in and of itself. Where are they going to store all this stuff? He lives at home and she has a small apartment! Insane.
Anyway, next example. I go with my mom to the mall yesterday morning, just because I needed to get out of my parents house for a morning. I would've just gone home, but I was picking Seth up at his parents after the Giants game, so I had to stick around a bit. So we go to the mall, and she already printed out the Macy's registry from the website at 7 AM that morning. We go right to the bridal registry area and print out a receipt of all the items that are left to purchase off the list. My mom takes her list right up to the cashier and says that she wants to buy all of their dishes and something else, I can't remember. The cashier takes a look at the freshly printed receipt and says thats its not on there anymore, someone already purchased it. Who could that other person possibly be? The only other person that knew they registered and would care so much to buy something so soon, her mother. So that just proves that there is someone equally as insane and nuts as my mom out there. Great, huh?
To make matters worse, my mom would not shut up about it. She must've gone on and mentioned that she couldn't believe she beat her to the punch at least 10 times to that cashier, maybe 5 more to the cashier she bought the bread maker on the list from, and another 7 or so while waiting for it all to be gift wrapped. It was at that point that I couldn't take it anymore and told my mom I'd meet up with her when she was done and I went to the Apple Store.
We walk in to my parents house and my dad asks me what we got. I hear my mom walking in behind me and before I opened my mouth I just point with my thumb back to my mom, and of course she goes into it all, yet again, for about the 5 millionth time. I need to spend less time at my parents house, because this crap is starting to drive me crazy. Their crazy will rub off on me, and thats not cool.
Funny side note to that story. As we're driving to the mall my mom mentions to me that Beth, my brother's fiance, and her parents and one of her sisters are coming to my parents house for Thanksgiving. Although my mom refers to her sister as the "weird" sister. I knew what that meant, because her youngest sister is a lesbian. So I said just that to my mom, and she then proceeds to take my tone as being anti-gay, when I'm not at all. She then goes onto tell me that a woman that she'd friend with, who lives in the same town as my bitch of an ex, called to tell her two weeks ago that the whore ex-o-mine is gay as well. I'm sitting there cracking up on the inside, because I'm not really sure how to handle that statement. When I first started dating the slut, after about a month of hanging out, we had the are we boyfriend and girlfriend talk. It was at this point that she told me up front, just so I should know, that she was bi-sexual, to which I had no problem with. Hell, I thought I hit the jackpot! I couldn't have been more wrong. So my mom telling me that she heard she was gay, was no big deal to me. So I tell my mom, "I wouldn't go that far. If anything, I'd say she's bi-sexual." I thought, in typical mom fashion, that she'd press the issue, but she just went on to say that they were a weird family and left it at that. Still funny as hell though.
Alright, thats enough babbling for now. Just the rest of today and Tuesday and Wednesday to get through and then its onto New Orleans! I spoke to my other ex that lives down there last night and we're going to try to hang out. Everyone, when I tell them that, instantly assumes that we'll be sleeping together or getting back together. I'd take option A, but hell no to option B. We'll see what happens. I just know it'll be a hell of a trip all around.
Peace!