I haven't done much of anything today, except exercise and get a hair cut. I must say it looks pretty good though. There was a new guy at the barber shop and he seems to know what he's doing, which is a good thing. Other than that, haven't been up to much today except chilling around the house, doing nothing.

Since I'm bored now I've decided to force myself to work on my screenplay. I want to have Elena read whatever I have done in about a week and get her thoughts, her being a theatre person and huge film fan and all. Its almost like I'm afraid to write sometimes because I don't want what I put on the paper to suck big time. This story has been bouncing around my head for 4 years or so now, its time to get it out and done, don't you think? I think so, so I'm going to try. Try not, do, or do not, there is no try. Yoda, you the man.

Elena's working tonight, Saturday and Sunday, which sucks. And tomorrow I think shes hanging with her friend thats currently in Connecticut going to grad school. She's down for the weekend and I'm sure Elena wants to see her before she leaves for London. I guess I can't be selfish and hog her all to myself, you know? As much as I want to. I know come Monday I'll see her plenty. No biggie.

Enough for now, must write about vampires. Peace.

Current music - Pearl Jam "Rats"

It's a little after 6 in the morning and I'm just not that creative at the moment. The dog woke me up at like 5:45 and now he's passed out next to me. Pain in the ass. I wish he could just walk himself. It can't be that hard, jump out of the bed (he's got that one downpat), open the bedroom door (that might be a problem), walk down the stairs (he does that with ease), unlock and open the front door (again, a possible problem), open the screen door (I'm sure with a running headbutt he could do it), go out on the grass, do his thing, come back inside, making sure he locked the door behind him. Is that too much to ask of my little dachschund? I don't think so.

Anyway, so I talked to Thomas, my old supervisor, last night, thanking him for whatever he said to Jim, the guy I interviewed with yesterday, and generally just BS-ing with him about stuff. He unfortunately has to go to New Jersey everyday and work with my old boss and manager and a client, for like a year, and he hates it. And he's only been doing it 2 weeks. Imagine in a month or two. So, he said he's try to give Jim a call in a day or so, whenever he gets a chance and just say that he spoke to me, I sounded really interested, liked Jim a lot, just generally trying to give me all the help I can get. I know Thomas, and I'm sure he can do it all as nonchalantly as possible. I can use all the help I can get in landing a full time gig, and this job, honestly, is probably the perfect fit for me, so I want it bad, real bad.

What's on tap for today? Need to go weigh myself at my mom's office first thing, because they're leaving for Hawaii tomorrow and I won't get a chance to do it tomorrow morning, first thing. I hope I lost at least 2 pounds so I can say I lost a total of 50 in 3 months, how sweet is that. And, if I lose over 6 I can say I weigh under 300, something I probably haven't been able to say in years. I feel great, this stuff works like a charm. Herbalife. I'd never sell the stuff like Elena is starting to do, I'm just not a salesman, but hell, I'll take it and waste away to nothing. I have no problem with that.

After the weekly weigh in I need to come home and exercise. I did an hour yesterday so I really need to do another hour today. In that hour I think I went 23 miles and burned something like 550 calories. Not bad. I think I can do a repeat today. We'll see. It feels good to get my heart pumping, a good sweat going and all that fun stuff. Then I really need to get a hair cut, because its been like 4 weeks or more since my last one and I look nasty. Its out of control. Need to tame the wild mop atop my head. (that rhymed, sort of, damn I'm a genius).

So thats about it. I was going to meet Seth in the city and then we'd go to Brooklyn to see Vertigo in Prospect Park with a live orchestra playing the score, but there won't be anyone home to watch Keyser, just my dad and he has to pack for Hawaii, plus he doesn't really watch the dog, just yell at him when he eats or destroys something he shouldn't, because he wasn't watching him in the first place. I figure I'll make like easy and just stay home and watch him myself.

And I'm spent.

Current music - Incubus "Aqueous Transmission"

The interview went awesome this morning, at least I think so. The guy I interviewed with was my age, in fact, we both started and went to Binghamton at the same time, but of course I left after two and a half years, he stayed all four. He also knows my old supervisor, Thomas, and my old manage, Tom, because they, along with me when I used to work for my Dad's company, set up their network, and he, the guy I interviewed with, his name is Jim, spoke highly of the both of them. Jim also said that Thomas highly recommended me, which is always a bonus. I think that all works in my favor.

Also working in my favor is the fact that I could sooooo do this job, and like it too. It sounds like there's plenty of the boring desktop support, but also interesting server side projects, which I like. So, we'll see what happens. They're going to call back two or three people for second interviews and choose from there. I think I'll definitely get the second interview. But, I'm not getting my hopes up too much, rejection sucks, and its better to be prepared, you know?

In other news, I'm about to exercise for the day, maybe I'll hit 50 or 55 or even 60 minutes. I'll have to see how I'm feeling. So, enjoy, I'm off to pedal to nowhere.

Current music - Jiimmy Eat World "My Sundown"

Once we finally got there through all the traffic in Staten Island, parked the car and waited on the longest line in the world to buy tickets, then it was fun. Of course, we ran right to the Batman ride, and of course, I didn't fit in the seat. But, this time they had a test seat, so I tried that out before even wasting time by waiting on line. So we went to the Freefall instead, which was fun, then rode Nitro, which was by far, the best roller coaster there. Then, we got this thing which lets you skip lines, well not really. You scan it at a rides entrance, and whatever the wait time for the ride is, you have a reservation for whatever time it is now plus the wait time. So we used it on the new Superman ride, which had a wait time of two hours, so we scan the thing and go do something else for two hours. We rode the Scream Machine right before it broke down, the looping shuttle thing, had some dippin dots, sat down in the shade, relaxed, went to the bathroom, then rode Superman, which was pretty cool because you sit down, then the chairs rotate 90 degrees so your back is parallel to the track. Never rode a roller coaster like that. Then we rode Medusa, which I barely fit on, then we left ad ate some pizza at Bertucci's. All in all, a fun day with my girlfriend.

So I hae to hop in the shower soon and get ready for my job interview. I hope it goes fantastic, because I really want THIS job. I think I'd be a good fit all around, and its not that far from home, not too bad of a commute, I'm sure the money and benefits are good. We'll see, just gotta go in there and knock 'em dead. Wish me luck. Then its who knows for the rest of the day. I need to exercise after my interview, and I desperately need a haircut, so that looks to be about it for me and my day. Enjoy yours.

And I'm pretty psyched. I get to spend the day with my lovely girlfriend and we get to ride roller coasters all day. Can't complain with that logic. I'm just hoping that I can fit in the rides this time around. I think I'm skinnier now than I was in 1999 when I went, lets see when I get up to Batman and whether or not the harness closes around me this time. I'll be pissed if it doesn't, especially if I have to wait in line for awhile and don't get to ride.

So, we never did go to see Swimming Pool yesterday. Elena just wasn't in the mood to go out to the movies, especially one that involved subtitles, so we just stayed in and watched Sex and the City on tape and then the Nutty Professor II on TV, which I passed out at the end, and then I went home. Needed a good nights sleep and some energy for today. Hopefully the weather will stay OK and the crowds won't be too bad. It is a random Tuesday, so who knows. They have this new reservation system though where you schedule a ride time and just jump to the front of the line when its your time to go, cool huh? We'll see if we use it.

OK, thats enough for now. I'll let you know how the trip goes!

Current music - Sarah McLachlan "Possession"

But there doesn't seem to be any action going on at the moment. My boss is in south Jersey working at a client so I'm sitting here at home, or have been , waiting for a call that has never, and probably won't come to sprin ginto action and go to a client. Oh well. Too bad. In the meantime I exercised for a good 45 minutes, and I really need to start pushing myself to 50, then 55 then to an hour. Spoke to Elena for awhile earlier, she e-mailed me about vacation deals through American Airlines to London, but it included a hotel stay for as long as I'm there and I don't need that, and it came to like 1000 for everything, whereas I could pay half that for a ticket only and just stay at Elena's apartment. So thats that.

I got a phone call today about a job interview. Have it set up for Wednesday. Its for a law firm right around the corner from where I used to work in Garden City for my dad's firm. Actually, as coincidence would have it, the IT dept of my dad's company, where I worked, also did consulting. And I basically spent a summer, with my manager at the time, at the law firm I'm interviewing at, setting up their first NT based network. Of course, no one I knew that worked in their IT department is there anymore, but it should be interesting. Hopefully it'll work out in my favor and I'll get the job, because this looks a whole lot better than the one I interviewed for last week. This one seems like I'd be able to put my skills to better use. So we'll see what happens.

Just watched Unfaithful, a very messed up movie, but what do you expect from the guy that brought you Fatal Attraction? I thought it was good, and Diane Lane is hot as hell. Enough said. So, I'm waiting to hear from Elena, so I can go over there, grab some dinner and catch that flick, Swimming Pool. Wish me luck on my interview and that I don't puke my guts out at Great Adventure tomorrow. Peace.

Pictures in my head of the final destination. So, I went to Elena's last night and one of her sisters rented Final Destination 2, so we ended up watching that. It was pretty entertaining. Maybe a little better than the first. Just as cheesy though, thats for sure. I actually find the elaborate ways they kill people off in those movies as quite comical. Especially the girl that just got splattered by the bus in the first one and the guy that gets cut into pieces by a piece of barbed wire fence sent flying through the air by an explosion. Or, the girl who gets impaled through the head when a firefighter, who is trying to get her out of her car, sets off the airbag and her head goes flying into a piece of PVC pipe that minutes earlier almost killed her. Funny shit if you ask me. And, any movie that has the guts to totally vaporize Ali Larter gets bonus points in my book. My ex would never watch the first one with me, even after I told her how cool it was, because it dealt with a place crash and she was paranoid about flying, kept thinking the plane was going to crash on her. She didn't like the fact that a plane she was on would fly over the ocean. Weird bitch, let me tell you.

So, tonight we're probably going to see Swimming Pool at this arthouse theatre close to Elena's house. i'd been there once before to see Memento with Seth back in 2000. The movie looks cool, then we'll probably watch last nights Sex and the City on tape, even though I cheated and watched it when I got home last night. Shhhhhh, don't tell anyone! Then, Tueday we're going to Great Adventure for some roller coaster goodness (the ex hated roller coasters too and wanted to kill me after making her ride one at Great Adventure the last time I was there). Then, Wednesday and Thursday Elena is working two doubles, but then Friday, my parents are leaving for Hawaii, so I'm sure Elena will just move in for the two weeks then! Should be fun. A nice way to spend as much time together as we can in the final three and a half weeks we have before she leaves. But I'm not going to talk about that now, because it makes me sad. But, I know she truly, madly and deeply loves me, so I think it'll all work out in the end (sorry Savage Garden, had to steal your lyric, you Roxette wannabe's).

OK, so on tap for today is basically sitting around the house,waiting to see if my boss is going to call me for work related purposes or not. In the meantime, really need to hit the exercise bike. Gotta keep that weight flying off, need to fit into the harnesses on the roller coasters tomorrow, unlike last time (Long story - basically, all I wanted to ride was the Batman ride last time I went, so that was the first ride we hit. We get up to the car, I get on and the harness won't lock around me, so I had to get off. How much does that suck?) Hopefully I'm slimmer now all around so I can fit in it.

Alright, now I'm out. Adios for now.

Current music - Nine Inch Nails "Closer"

Well, the lack of sleep caught up to me around 1 PM. I even managed to exercise for 45 minutes this morning and got in a good workout. Then, come 1 PM, I decided to lay down and I passed out cold for about an hour. Then, I went down on the couch on the living room and passed out until at least 4 PM or so. Felt pretty good. Wasted the day, but its Sunday, who cares.

Got some stuff accomplished this morning though. I finally managed to steal a copy of a program I've been dying to get for months for my iBook. I decided to take a look on the peer to peer file sharing program I have for my iBook and the program I wanted, along with a crack for the activation/serial number, was all there, and it works too, how about that?

Now I'm just waiting to see whats going on in my house for dinner and then I'll probably see Elena. Not sure if she's going to come here to watch Sex and the City or if I'll go there once the tape is over. But we'll see. Doesn't matter to me either way, I just want to see her.

Tomorrow night I think we're going to see that movie Swimming Pool and then on Tuesday we're going to Great Adventure in New Jersey to ride some rollercoasters and whatnot. Fun fun fun. Then, Friday my parents leave for Hawaii and they'll be gone for two weeks. I told Elena, and she pretty much echoed it, that she's free to move in for those two weeks. I have plenty of drawer space in my dresser and an empty lingerie chest of something that was my ex-girlfriends. She left behind her grandmother's furniture because there was no way it was going to fit into a Honda Civic when she left. So thats my furniture. I don't mind, because the bed is so damn comfortable!!!

OK, thats enough disjointed ramblings.

I'm never, ever, not in a million years, driving into Queens again, especially at night. Well, not never. I'll go to Seth's apartment because I've been there so many times I have it commited to memory and then some. But under any other cirumstances, no way, uh uh, you come to me, in Long Island, where its easy to navigate.

Where to begin? So Elena and I went to her friends birthday in Astoria Queens yesterday. She had good directions to get there, so that wasn't a problem. Parking was, but its Queens, thats nothing new. The party was fun, I got to meet a lot of Elena's theatre friends from when she worked in Virginia last year. Come 2:00-2:30 we decide its time to go as most of the party people were ready to crash anyway. Elena, being the good soul that she is, offers to drive a few of her friends home. We drop off the first one, and he knows where his apartment is and how to get there relative to where we were. Not a problem.

The next guy knows what his address is, but he was pretty clueless on how to get there. So we were wandering around Queens for awhile trying to find it. In the meantime, I have to go to the bathroom so bad, I feel like its coming out of my eyeballs. We finally find two cops standing on a corner and ask them how to get to where we have to go. The guy lives of Queens Blvd, and he didn't know how to get there. Amazing. So we finally get to his place and drop him off.

Her last friend lied in Manhattan, and we weren't going to drop her off, just let her out somewhere close to a cab she could catch back to her apartment. That somewhere turned out to be Manhattan. So, since we were pretty much on Queens Blvd, we took the 59th St, or Queensboro Bridge into Manhattan. Of course getting on the bridge wasn't easy, because we kept getting off the track, and looping around and back. We finally get on the bridge, into Manhattan and drop her friend off and then proceed to hop back on the bridge and back onto Queens Blvd.

At this point I offered to drive because I knew where we were going a little better because I'd driven in the area once or twice for clients and whatnot. So, we pulled over and switched and I'm driving down Queens Blvd, with the intention of hopping on the BQE and taking that to the Grand Central. In the meantime, the BQE is being torn to shit for construction and the exits are all messed up, so we get thrown off on Astoria Blvd or something. I have no idea. So we wander areound some more, lost some more. We asked one guy for directions and they were crap, so as we were lost, we asked another guy and his were better. When we finally get to where he says to go, I realize its exactly where the BQE dumped us. Had I just made a left and then antoher left, I would've been right on the Grand Central and saved us another 15-20 minutes of wandering around. Now in the meantime, I have to go to the bathroom again, and really bad.

So, fighting the urge to wet myself, I drive back to Elena's restaurant where my car is parked, say goodbye to Elena and drive home at top speed so I could use the bathroom. I didn't get home until 4:45, and we left Queens around or before 2:30. What a mess. at least the dog let me sleep until almost 9 AM, so I got like 4 hours of sleep. Thank God for small favors, huh?

So now I'll probably waste the day away by sleeping or something and see Elena later. We wanted to go see this foreign flick "Swimming Pool" which is playing in this art hosue theatre close to her house and it is Sunday, which is Sex and the City night, but I always tape in anyway. So we shall see. I should really exercise, but I'm really tired. And its Sunday. We'll see what happens on that front.

Current music - Pearl Jam "Of The Girl"

I'm meeting Elena after work and we're heading to Queens for a friend of her's birthday party. Should be fun, I guess. I really don't care, I just want to spend the time with Elena. And, if when she gets off work and she's too tired to go we'll just go to her house and hang out for awhile. Doesn't matter to me, just want to spend as much time with my girlfriend before she goes to live on the other side of the ocean.

I've definitely felt much better and felt less weird around her since we had our talk. I really think it was good for us to get it out there and into the open how we felt. You can't let stuff like that stew because it just gets worse. I'm doing my best to make sure that we keep in touch once she's over there. I'm giving her a decent computer, capable of probably so much more than the piece of crap she had from when she went to NYU. I helped her order a pretty nice digital camera so she can take pic, throw them on the laptop and send them to me. So, I'm doing my best is what it boils down to.

Although she did say the other night that if I learn how to cook by the time she comes back we'll stay together. I know she was joking, but I should seriously do something like that. I need to stay busy while she's over there, so I don't go nuts, and what better way then to pick up a new hobby or something. And, my mom is an awesome cook, so I can't ask for a better teacher. We'll see.

Anyway, didn't do too much today, just kind of loafed around. Took a few naps. Watched The Recruit, which was OK. It started out strong, but just ended all stupid. It was entertaining though. We watched A Guy Thing last night, and that was kind of dumb, except for a few funny moments, it was crap. Beats what we started to watch, which were Eric Rohmer's Moral Tales. Elena got that recommended to her through Netflix and she thought they looked like little vignettes of erotica. Hell NO. She rented Breathless for me a few months back by Jean-Luc Goddard, a prominent member of the French New Wave of cinema in the late 50's early 60's. So Rohmer was a French New Wave guy too, and we watched one tale of morality and said no thanks the the other. Funny stuff.

Alright, so I have like three hours to kill before I go to get Elena at work. I think I'll exercise off all the shit I ate today because I cheated on my diet big time, but its the weekend, its bound to happen. As long as I get back on the program and hit it hard on Monday, I'll be good. Only need to lose 2 more pounds for that big 50 pound loss. Peace.

Current music - Matthew Sweet "Devil With The Green Eyes"

The more I really don't want this job I interviewed for, and for once, I'm kind of hoping that I don't get a job. The job is simply working the telephone help desk, from 3 - 11, which sucks. What sucks even more is that I'm qualified to do so much more. I'm Microsoft Certified to be a Systems Administrators, not a help desk operator that someone calls like directory assistant. Soon I'll have the title of Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer, which means I should be building systems, not taking phone calls. I just know that if I take it, I'm going to hate it and be miserable. I want my job to be challenging and fun, not sitting in a cube and answering the phone all day. We'll see, hopefully the people interviewing me realize that I'm just way too over qualified for the position, which I really am. In the meantime I just need to plug away at the classifieds on Sunday, hit the Microsoft books to finish up my MCSE and then start hitting things like Monster and HotJobs, although they both really suck.

On the positive side of things, spent a really great day with Elena yesterday. We did some shopping, took a look around Best Buy for the digital camera she wanted and then grabbed some take out food at Outback. Then we just hung around my house and watched a couple of flicks. All in all, a fun day. She's working tonight, so I probably won't see her, unless I feel compelled to go to her house to lay out in the sun, which is probably a no. I'm not into tanning, and it turns out tanning is her all time favorite past time, so what can you do? I can always go over there and just hop in the pool, sit in the shade and relax. We'll see.

In the meantime I really should hit the exercise bike or something. I only did it half assed yesterday for like 20-25 minutes. My heart just wasn't in it and I was distracted thinking about this job shit. I guess I shouldn't really worry about it until I get an offer, because otherwise I'm just beating myself up over nothing, you know? Well, peace out.

Current music - A Perfect Circle "Judith"

So, the interview went well, I think. Who knows if I have a shot in hell at landing the job. I've ceased given up thinking I'm going to get it, so in the even that I don't, I won't be let down, and if I do get it, it'll be a pleasant suprise. The other good thing is that one of the people that I interviewed with knows my old supervisor from when I worked at my Dad's company. He grew up with her son, so that has to score bonus points. Its not what you know, its who you know. Now for the bad, the place mans a help desk 24/7/365, so someone has to be there at all times and they work in shifts. Well, the only open shift is from 3 in the afternoon to 11 at night, which would suck. But, since Elena is going away soon anyway, it'll fit my schedule OK I guess. We'll see if I even get it. And like I said, if I don't, its all good.

Then, after my interview I went to a client. Drove an hour to get there, spent 20 minutes there, then drove back, stopping on the way at Elena's restaurant to get some lunch, served by the most lovely waitress in the world (I must admit it though, I'm a little biased on that one). Lunch was good, and now I'm home, about to hop on the exercise bike to burn off my lunch hopefully. I've dropped 45 pounds so far on this diet Elena put me on. I've been trying hard to be good this week so that I can make that final push to losing 50 total. Then its only a 50 more and I'll be happy with my weight. Sick, huh? I won't even get into what I did weigh (hint: A good amount of 300). I didn't look it though, but I felt it, and was quite digusted with myself. So not only am I making the push to losing 50, but its also a push to weigh under 300, so there, now you know approximately how much I weighed before the diet.

Alright, going to ride the bike. Peace.

Current music - Audiovent "The Energy"

In everything else thats been going on in my life I totally neglected to mention that I have a job interview this morning at 9 AM. Its with Catholic Health Services of Long Island. They own, or operate or are just affiliated with a bunch of hospitals all over the island, including the closest one to me, which although its under a different name now, I was actually born at. Its an IT job and I hope getting all those Microsoft Certifications in the past month will actually help me out for a change. I busted my ass for those and I really want a full time job. If I'm going to visit Elena I'm going to need cash, lots of it, because I've heard that London is one expensive city.

Plus, the job is pretty much local. The interview is in Melville, right down the road from where the restaurant Elena works at is located. I'm sure since they own a crap load of hospitals the benefits are awesome and I don't really care about the salary as long as its decent enough and on a consistent basis so I can pay all my bills a month, pay off my credit card debt and save my money for the future. (After I buy a new laptop that is, thats first order of business once the credit cards are paid off and some money is in the bank). So, wish me luck, because I really, really want this.

In other news, there really isn't. Hung out with Elena last night. We went to the mall so she could return some items she got a month ago that didn't fit her, then we went for some virtually fat free frozen yogurt, yummy stuff. Then we came back to my house, I showed her a laptop that I'd been working on all day for her to bring to London with her, this way I know for a fact that she has a working computer, capably of getting on the Internet so I know that we'll be able to chat and e-mail each other. She also said she wants to get a digital camera so she can send pictures of London and herself back to me and her family, so we need to hit Best Buy someday soon and check that out.

And we watched Daredevil, because she's never seen it and since Mark works at Blockbuster he gets it earlier than the street date. All I have to say is damn, Jennifer Garner is still hot. And, Elena really liked the movie, which is cool.

Alright, thats enough, gotta hit the shower, shave, make myself look presentable, smell nice and all that other stuff. Wish me luck.

Current music - Eve 6 "Sunset Strip Bitch"

When it doesn't work. Our cable went out about 5 or 6 pm yesterday and was still out this morning. I called the cable company and they said they'd send a repairman over today. Around 3 o'clock the repairman called and said he was on his way and wouldn't you know it, at that moment that cable came back on. Unbelievable. Of course I was forced to use my brother's dial up account to MSN and since our phone lines are ancient, it connects at under 28.8, which is crawling. I've been spoiled by broadband, big time.

But if you try sometimes, you just might find, you get what you need. The Rolling Stones have the right idea there. I finally had the guts to talk to Elena last night and although a lot of the conversation is fuzzy because it kept going back and forth, in the end, I think it ended OK. I feel a lot better, which is good. I got everything off my chest, let her know just how I feel and what I want for our relationship and she expressed her feelings. It didn�t come exactly how I wanted it to, but I think it came out just fine.

Basically, it boils down to this in all its simplicity, if it�s meant to be, it will be. That�s actually part of a quote in her AOL profile. I said I could agree with that, but it�s not going to stop me from wanting it to be with all my heart and soul, and then she said that was fine, because the whole quote goes something like this: �If it�s meant to be, it will be. But that doesn�t mean you shouldn�t hope, wish, pray and dream for it to be.� So I said I was going to hope, wish, pray and dream with all my might and she said she would too, and that made me happy.

So, who knows what the future holds? No one does. I don�t, she doesn�t, so we�re just going to have to give a shot and see what happens. We can�t make any guarantees and we can�t force something to work that�s just not going to happen. But in the meantime, I really really really really want it to happen and I�m going to do everything in my power to make it so. Enough said.

Got my passport stuff in the works yesterday so that I can go and visit Elena. Not sure when I�m going to have a chance to go, but as often as possible and she said I have an open invitation, which is nice. I also went to the DMV on Monday to get my New York license back; I�ve been carrying around my Louisiana license for a year, so I was without a photo ID yesterday at the post office�s passport office. I had to ask my mom to come down and sign an affidavit saying that I was who I claimed I was. In 4-6 weeks I should have my passport and I can freely leave the country. Woo hoo.

So that�s about it. I feel a lot better now that I got everything off my chest and out in the open. Everything between us isn�t definite, but I think I�m OK with that. For all I know, if she wasn�t going we could break up in a few months time. I doubt it, but it could happen. So, I�m hoping, wishing, praying and dreaming for the best, and that�s all I can do.

Current music � The Rolling Stones �Sympathy for the Devil�

And I think its getting worse. Well, its what, Tuesday afternoon at the moment, and I still haven't had the stomach to have that talk with Elena and I really think its getting worse by the day. I can feel it and its a feeling I hate. I feel like something bad is going to happen and I really don't want it to. She is honestly the best thing to ever happen to me and I don't want anything to fuck it up.

So, basically, despite the fact that I have all this stuff I want to get off my chest, she's extremely stressed out about moving to London. Extremely and stressed don't even begin to describe it, I don't think. She's going to grad school over there with a friend and her friend has the most laid back attitude about everything, because thats just the type of person that she is. Elena leaves in a month and they still don't have a place to live when they get there. Thats freaking Elena out, and I understand.

Her friend doesn't seem to be so concerned though. Also, her friend has barely any money to spend for rent, so Elena is worried that she'll be living in a dump or way too far away from her school. Also, she got all this stuff in the mail from her school yesterday and there's a possibility that there's a third term added to her program that run from May 2004 - September 2004, so that means instead of being gone for 9 months, it'll be a year and a month. I didn't like it one bit. Now I knew she was moving to London at the end of August when I met her, but you can't help the way you feel about someone, you know?

All this moving to London stuff, the planning and whatnot is definitely taking its toll on her, I can just tell and I feel like its having a really bad effect on our relationship. We only have one month left together, and I don't want to spend it like this. I may just be selfish, I may not, I don't know. I just know I don't like the way things seem to be heading. And I know we need to talk about it, but it just never seems like the right time, especially not today after all the stress its given her in the past two days, she must've called London ten times today trying to find a place to live, and her friend is leaving for Scotland on like Thursday and isn't going to have the time, opportunity or money to check things out in London. I don't know.

I know the timing sucks, but the more I think about it, the more I come to realize that there never really is a good time to talk about things that are difficult to talk about or things that you don't want to talk about. I'll probably go over her house tonight to watch a movie and I think regardless of the situation we need to talk about this stuff, because I'm worried about her, I'm worried about me and I'm worried about us.

Current music - Cracker "Eurotrash Girl" (kind of ironic, huh?)

Talk about weird. Here I am contemplating my hopefully wonderful future with Elena and one of my best friends, Brett, calls me today to see whats up and casually mentions that by the end of the year he's probably going to get engaged to his girlfriend of six months. Six months may seem like a short time, but I think my parents got engaged after something like six weeks, so its all relative. So who am I to judge? More power to him I say. If she makes him happy, then he should go for it, because life is way too short to not be happy. As long as he makes me one of the ushers or whatever the hell they are, I'm cool. And as long as he sets a wedding day in which Elena is no longer in London, even better. So, congrats Brett, whenever it becomes official. I'm happy for you!

So yesterday was the big day Elena's been working towards for who knows how many months, her first cousin, and closest cousin, Gina got married yesterday. Elena busted her butt big time to get in shape, look good, sound good and who knows what else, and it wasn't even her wedding. It really was a beautiful day, all in all, and I'm really glad that I got a chance to be a part of it.

For one thing, Elena looked amazing in her very purple bridesmaid dress. She definitely stood out, but I must admit it, I'm a little biased. She sung Ave Maria at the church and it was really amazing, even though I've heard her sing it probably a dozen or so times, give or take. The service at the church was really nice too. I've never really been to a full mass type service, especially for a wedding, but it was really interesting and beautiful too.

Onto the reception. The food was pretty damn good. I also had a very important job, although I didn't realize it was all my job. I'll explain. Elena sang the wedding song, and she had a karaoke type CD made by a friend of hers with just the music, and she'd supply the words. She had me make two copies of the track she was singing to and bring them with me to the wedding, and I returned the master to her. Now, I was under the impression that she would be bringing her master CD with her, and that I was only bringing the copies as backups, in case she forgot her master. Oh no, the CD"s I was bringing with me were the ones she was singing to. Had no idea. Thankfully the one I stuffed in my jacket worked like a charm.

Anyway, so Elena sung the wedding song, which was Etta James' "At Last" and let me say, she kicked that songs ass. It was really, really amazing, and you could tell the bride and groom more than appreciated the effort. As the song was coming to a close they danced over to Elena to hug her a kiss her just as she was finishing the last couple of words to the song. Very touching.

The only other thing I can think of is the following. I requested a really nice slow song for the DJ's to play, because the only type of dancing I really enjoy is slow dancing. So, being me, I really wanted to play something a little different, something really pretty that Elena and I could dance to, so I requested The Beatles "Something." Being good DJ's, they obliged and played the song, but only after they announced that the wedding cake was served, so no one was on the dance floor. I told Elena that I requested the song because I wanted to dance with her to it, so she dragged me up on the floor and we danced to it together, all alone, with no one else on the floor with us. Granted I was a little embarassed, considering I stick out like a sore thumb at 6'5", but it was really special, like it was our own little moment together. I was didn't take my eyes off of her's and I was singing the song, it was really sweet.

Which brings me to my next set of thoughts. I really, reallly, really love this girl, and after seeing such a huge display of love at this wedding yesterday, it makes me think of the future Elena and I could have together. Now, a couple of weeks ago when we went to see the Producers on Broadway we got a little drunk at her favorite Mexican restaurant and we were talking about something, and she was saying that she can see a definite future with me, and she's not just talking years. She says she has a connection with me that she's never had with anyone else, on every level too, intimate, friendship, common interests, etc. It was really sweet when she said it to me, and I'm hoping it wasn't just the tequila talking. So, I can really see our relationship going the distance, even though we've only been going out for three and a half months.

I don't know, its hard to organize my thoughts clearly, but I know that we need to have serious talk about it, because it also brings me to the next thing thats on my mind, and thats she's leaving for London in a month. I know I need to tell her how I really feel before she leaves, because I really don't want to lose her, even though she'll be on the other side of the ocean. I hope she feels the same way, even though I'm pretty sure she does. Hopefully tonight we'll get a chance and if I have the guts to. I was going to last night, but she was exhausted, and I understand completely. It was an exhausting day.

So thats about it. I'll stop ranting. I got the day to myself because Elena is in the city with her dad for some Herbalife thing, so I'll hopefully see her later tonight. I guess I'll study for my next test. Only two more to go for my MCSE, and I'm like a man possessed at this point.

Alright, I'm out.

Current music - The Beatles "With a Little Help From My Friends"

I'll get to the dreams in a second. Just thought I'd get a little side busness out of the way first. I passed my Microsoft test on Active Directory, and I must say, one, its not as hard as people make it out to be, or at least I think they make it out to be hard, two, I'm amazed I actually understood the stuff, but oh well. Now, I'm onto the security test, which looks like it might be a doozy, and then after that its onto the security desgin exam, and once thats done with, I'll have my MCSE. Then, all I need to take is the exam on ISA and I'll have my MCSE: Security and MCSA: Security. Just what I need, 5 acronyms on my resume. Yes, I'm an MCP, MCSA, MCSE, MCSA: Security and an MCSE: Security. Talk about blowing smoke up ones ass, but oh well.

Speaking of resume's, I got a call back about a resume I sent in over the weekend. I left the guy a message last night, probably after he left, hopefully I'll hear back from him today and I'll be able to set up an interview. Full time employment beckons me, and I want it.

Other than that, Elena and I went to her cousins rehearsal dinner last night and it was pretty fun. The wedding rehearsal was interesting because I've really never seen one before, after all, I've only been to like 3 weddings in my life. The dinner was fun too. It was at John Harvards, where Elena and I had our first date. I probably drank a little too much beer, and am sort of paying the price today in the form of a slight stomach ache and some weird kind of stomach/chest pains. I know its not a heart attack because it feels too low in my chest, and besides, I'm 24 and my cholesterol is perfect. The wedding is Saturday and I'm hoping its pretty fun. We shall see.

Onto my dream. Weird doesn't even begin to describe it. Here's what I think was going on. Somehow, I think my house was really a giant hotel and for some reason, these two frat guys that used to live across the hall from me in Binghamton were there. I used to be friends with one of them, but then he joined the frat and that was the end of that because I wasn't good enough to be his friend anymore. His roommate I always hated and we never got along, so f-him. Anyway, I think it was New Years Eve, because people kept talking about fireworks on TV at midnight, but, it was warm out, like it is now, like it was the 4th of July or something. So they were on their way out and I kept taunting and making fun of the guy I hated and he kept wanting to fight me but the other guy was holding him back. The fact that they were in my dream alone is weird enough.

So then I go through my house and people are watching TV, waiting, and then fireworks go off outside and I take the dog outside to see, because I know he doesn't like them, but he doesn't freak out. Then, I go up to my room because I"m expecting Elena to come over. I think she was getting off work or something. So, I go in my room and in my bed are, get this, Avril Lavigne (spelling?) and I think the other girl was Brittany Murphy. Not totally sure though. Anyway, they're in my bed and making out. But when I show up I interupt them and they start to go. Elena shows up and asks to take a shower, totally not caring that Avril Lavigne and Brittany Murphy are in my room, half naked no less. As I'm talking to Elena I'm making sexual innuendos to Avril Lavigne. Elena goes to shower and then Avril Lavigne and I start making out. And then I woke up.

Swear to you, on my honor, thats what I dreamed. Weird huh? I have no idea what inspired it. I don't even like Avril Lavigne or think she's that attractive. And I definitely don't think Brittany Murphy is attractive now that she's like a waif. Oh well. It was fun while I was dreaming it.

Current music - Alice in Chains "Down in a Hole"

Damn, after this week I don't think I ever want to get married. Elena's first cousin, Gina, is getting married on Saturday and between everything Elena has to do to get ready, like her bridesmaid dress, practicing singing, making sure she's tan and looking good, its driving her nuts. Imagine if it was her own wedding? Scary thought. And I'm sure every woman would be like that, because women are nuts, especially about those things.

But, I'm sure everything will be fine, the wedding will be fun despite all the family drama surrounding it. I don't understand it and would probably make a mess of it trying to explain it. Lets just say that a close family member was disinvited by the bride's mother to the shower and was never invited to the wedding because of some incident that happened with their kids two years ago at Christmas, and since no kid ever apologized, the disinviting and no inviting. Sounds real silly to me, but thats just me.

The rehearsal dinner is tonight and its being held at the restaurant Elena and I had our first date at, John Harvards. Should be fun and nostalgic to go back there. I drive by where we first kissed all the time, the parking lot outside of Starbucks. Romantic, huh? Anyway, I'm stll amazed I had the guts to go for it.

So, on the schedule today besides the dinner? I have my next Microsoft test. This one is all about the wonders of Active Directory in Windows 2000. Although a lot of people say this is one of the hardest tests in the whole MCSE track, my old supervisor has failed it twice, I think, I feel pretty good about it. I actually cam close to passing one of my practice tests on the first try, which never happens. And even though the software said I failed, the grade would have been good enough to pass the real thing. I just have Active Directory on the brain. The words Active Directory actually popped into my head when it should be the furthest thing from my mind. Enough said. I pass this and then I only have two tests to go before I earn my MCSE. Then, if I take one more after that, of course a certain one, I earn my MCSE: Security and MCSA: Security. Damn my resume will look bloated with all this alphabet soup.

So I guess thats enough for now. Gonna run into my moms office to weigh myself soon, see how much I've lost this week, because I'm just melting away! Soon there will be nothing left of me! Oh no!

Current music - Coldplay "A Rush of Blood to the Head"

The weather is beautiful out at the moment, so naturally, like the pasty white boy I am I'm inside, studying for my next damn Microsoft test. I think I'll take it on Thursday, get it over with and not have to worry about the next one until after the weekend. After all, it is the weekend of the big wedding, Elena's favorite cousin in the world. So hopefully it'll be fun, although there's more drama surrounding this shindig than a Best Picture nominee. Its too much to go into, and I don't think I understand it all, but it should be interesting once people start getting drunk and whatnot.

So we're celebrating Keyser turning two today with a little BBQ and some cake my mom will make him. Just some plain poundcake, something that won't kill him if he eats it. Elena's going to come over and thats about it on the guest list, but its ok. I'm just amazed that Keyser's birthday came and went without my bitch of an ex-girlfriend trying to get in touch with me. I really would have thought she was going to at least try and call me cell phone. I think she's finally getting the point that I want nothing to do with her. Took her long enough.

At the moment I'm typing this using m brother's insanely huge Dell laptop. He got the Inspiron 8500, which is a total knockoff of a 15 inch PowerBook, except this thing is in no way like an inch thin or five pounds, more like two to two and half inches, and weighing in around 9 pounds I would guess. Its a monster. The screen is way too huge and you can barely read the type on the screen. At least I'm having a little trouble, and my eyes are young, I'm 24! Plus, the keyboard sucks. Its taken me awhile but I think I'm finally used to typing on it, but I fell like I'm reaching to hit certain keys. I'd never buy the thing, but he likes it. Can't win em all.

Anyway, I think thats all for now. If I think of anything else or the insipiration strikes me, I'll be sure to jot down my thoughts. Peace.

Current music - Pearl Jam "Not For You" (Live 4/30/03 - Nassau Coliseum)

That was Keyser on his birthday last year, when he turned 1 year old. I couldn't believe he let me put the hat on him and, to top it all off (no pun intended) actually seemed to like wearing it. Dogs, you never can tell with them, you know? Anyway, Keyser turns 2 today and its hard to believe I've had him for almost two years. I didn't actually buy him until September 9, 2001, two days before 9/11, so that should've been a sign to toss him to the curb, but oh well. He was just too damn cute as a puppy to toss him aside.

He's getting better in his older age. He's definitely calmed down a lot, but I think that also has a lot to do with the ex's departure and bringing the other dog with her. Less competition for food, toys and most of all attention. People say dog calm down as they get older, they sleep more, but not Keyser, I mean, he's always slept a lot, but its not like he sleeps any more or any longer. We were up at 5:30 this morning and I was ready to kill him.

Then, to top is off, he insisted on laying down on my head as I tried to sleep on the couch. We've been lounging on the living room couch ever since. I was going to do something meaningful today, like exercise, but I pulled a muscle in my back, on the side by my ribs and its killing me, worse than yesterday and I have no idea how it happened. It was fine this morning until I went to grab my stuff to exercise (a sign perhaps?) Oh well. I'll probably sit on the couch studying all day for my next Microsoft exam, which I really want to get over with already. Don't want the momentum to stall out, ya know?

Alright, so I'm going to take a nice long shower to help my back and then its back to the couch to relax and read about Active Directory in Windows 2000, fun stuff huh? Adios all!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KEYSER!!!

Current music - Pearl Jam "Even Flow" (Live 7/9/03 - Madison Square Garden)

P.S. Mike McCreedy is by far, the best guitarist out there today. He tore the shit out of his guitar solo on this one the other night. I knew it was going to kick ass when he started it off by playing the guitar behind his head. Amazing, simply amazing.

Man I'm exhausted, and I'm getting ready to ride the exercise bike for almost an hour because I need to. I didn't get home from Pearl Jam until like 1:15 in the morning last night. It would have been sooner if I hadn't been a total tool and fell asleep on the train and missed my stop. I woke up just as the train doors closed on my station. So, I had to get off at the next station, walk a couple of blocks, find a cab and pay him to take me to my car at the Mineola train station. What fun. But, it was worth it, because Pearl Jam kicked some serious ass at Madison Square Garden, and here are my thoughts.

I took a look yesterday morning at the set list they played the night before I went and I was blown away. They played for like 3 hours, 30 songs, with such rarities as Crown of Thorns, Breath (which they barely play and I've been dying to hear), Sonic Reducer, Stuff with Ben Harper and who knows what else. Seth was at that show too and he said it was amazing. So I got all psyched for last nights show, because if I know one thing, its that Pearl Jam are going to do their best to top themselves.

Unfortunately, they didn't play as long as they did the night before, maybe only two and a half hours instead of three, and definitely not the rarities they played, no Breath, but they did play a lot of other stuff I'd never heard live before which was cool. When the concert was over I was a little disappointed at first at the lack of equal length and rare tunes, but as I thought it over, I was highly, highly satisfied. It kicked some major ass.

They started off with Crazy Mary, which they never do and Mike McCreedy (guitar God) went nuts doing a dueling solo with Boom, the keyboard player. Then they just started ripping into a lot of hard tunes. I think they were honestly just trying to put in more intensity than the night before, and I think it worked. Even Flow was amazing as Mike went insane again. Seriously, I think Mike McCreedy is the greatest guitarist of our time, not of all time, but of the current crop of rock guitarists out there doing their thing, Mike kills them all.

They played some awesome renditions of stuff like Alive, Rockin in the Free World, Yellow Ledbetter to close, and I can't even remember what else, I just know it was good, very good. I can't wait to get the bootleg so I can listen again. Good stuff, good stuff.

So its off to exercising and then to my moms office to do my weekly weigh in. I'm curious how much I lost this week, if anything after the whole 4th of July weekend which was a pig out fest, but we'll see. Wish me luck. Adios.

Current music - Pearl Jam "Even Flow" (Live from Jones Beach, 8/25/00)

I must say, my holiday weekend was not bad at all, despite a few little things, which really aren't that bad, all in all it was a fun weekend by all. I guess you could say the weekend, for me at least, started Thursday. I passed my test, got my MCSA (already got the e-mail from Microsoft sorta congratulating me) and then had some awesome pizza for lunch with Elena and went to see T3, which was pretty good.

Then it was Friday, the 4th. Elena came over and we laid out in the sun for awhile and then people started coming over. Her father stopped by for a little while to meet my parents and such and I think it went really well. A lot of my parents friends noticed all the weight I lost thanks to Herbaliife, which was really a good feeling. So far its 37 pounds, but after this weekend, I might have gained a few, we'll see. Need to hit the exercise bike in a little while and burn some calories. So we ate at my house and were going to go to another party in her neighborhood, but we were too drained, her from the sun, and me from the sun and all the Mike's Hard Lemonade I was drinking, so we stuck around my house, watched an episode of Band of Brothers and called it a night.

Saturday was uneventful, as Elena was working as usual. I ran some errands for my Mom and returned bottles and cans for the refund money. I must say, the machines have improved since the days when I did that for my mom as a young'un. Much more automated and a much less can/bottle rejection rate. Got back $13.55 from all that. Aren't I a rich man. Went to get some take out Saturday night and found out that my brakes in my car were barely working. I had them replaced about three months ago, so I knew that couldn't be it. Elena's dad is a mechaninc, and while he was throwing some new tires on my car Friday (because my old tires were shot) he took a look at the brakes but couldn't find anything wrong with them. Of course, he asked me if the specific thing it was doing was happening and I said I wasn't sure. Had I just said yes, he probably would've fixed it on Friday, now I'm without a car today as it gets fixed.

Sidenote: Here's whats happening to the brakes. Say you're already at a stop at like a red light. You know how much pressure you need to apple to the brake to stay stopped at an idle. Well imagine that pressure increases, because the brake pedal slowly slips away from you and unless you basically slam it to the floor, you're going to either stray into oncoming traffic or hit the car in front of you. And thats just when you're stopped at a light. Imagine what its like trying to come to a stop when going 30, 40 or 50 mph. Elena's dad said it was the master cylinder on the ABS system and since my car is out of warranty the dealership would rape me on it, so he said to give him the car, he'd fix it. So I drove it over to her house at like 10 AM on Sunday and just spend the day there.

Spent most of Sunday either laying out in the sun or relaxing in the pool. Must say I'm the tannest I've ever been in my life at the moment. And I'm not that tan, scary huh? I'm just a pale white Jew, can't help it. Then Elena's dad invited my parents to come by for dinner, which they did. Didn't have a chance to ask them about it this morning as Keyser actually let me sleep to 7 AM for the second morning in a row. I'm sure they enjoyed themselves. Plus, they got to hear Elena sing for the first time, since her parents made her. But she's got a beautiful voice, so there was nothing to be embarrased about.

Then we watched Fatal Attraction. She'd never seen it, but I had a few times. But that movie is always a nice reminder as to why men should keep it in their pants when even the slightest thought of cheating on their woman comes to mind. After that, since I was without a car, Elena drove me home and we watched my tape of that nights episode of Sex and the City. After that she was still awake, so we watched another episode of Band of Brothers and then she went home.

So, not sure what today will bring. I have no car at the moment, so if I have to work I'll have to have my brother drive me to my mom's office so I can take her car and boy do I love driving that BMW. I hate it actually, but its so hard to convey sarcasm by text only, you know? So thats about it. Probably going to see Legally Blonde 2 tonight, so we'll see. In the meantime I'll probably hit the bike, drink my breakfast shake and start studying for next Microsoft test on the wonders of Active Directory. Fun stuff. Peace out.

Current music - Liz Phair "Polyester Bride"

Hope everyone out there has a very fun and very safe celebration of American revolutionary behavior! I'm sure I will, although who knows what the hell I'm doing. I know Elena is coming over and we'll eat dinner at my house, but then I think we're going to a friend of ehr family's thats having a big party, so that will be fun.

So, I passed my test today, so go me. I'm now an MCSA, finally, after starting down the path in January, it only took a few months, although I really kicked it into gear the past month, taking two tests in the span of less than two weeks. Lets hope I can keep the momentum going so I can get my MCSE by the end of the summer. We'll see.

Went to see Terminator 3 today and I was suprised at how much I enjoyed it and thought it was pretty damn good for the type of movie that it was. It ended in a way I totally didn't expect, but thought was pretty damn cool regardless. Definitely left it wide open for T4, whenever that will be. We'll just have to wait and see, but I liked it.

Thats about all you'll get out of me at 1 AM in the morning. I'm going to bed. Good night Irene!

OK, I haven't worked all week and now I'm starting to get a little bored, which sucks. I'm pretty much done studying for my test tomorrow and even went so far as to redo my resume in preperation for the eventual job hunt to come. What fun. Now I just need to pass the test so I can put MCSA on it along with the cool little corresponding logo! Yeah, I rock. I think the resume looks good, because as we all know, the content may be important, but its gotta look good too. Its kind of packed, as in I used up practically every inch of usable space in the Word document, but I like it. Who knows if it will help me get a job or not. One would hope.

In the meantime, to stave off boredom, besides blogging at the moment I'm using this cool little program I read about in the new issue of Macworld I just got today. Its called Clutter and what it does, if you have it open while you're listening to music in iTunes 4, is it goes out to Amazon.com and displays a little picture of the album cover of the song you're listening to. With a handy dandy click of the mouse you can have the program copy that album cover art into iTunes so that it will always be there. Now I have over 3000 AAC files on my iBook, so thats a lot to do, and if I find it takes up a lot of HD space for all those image files, I'll kill them, but in the meantime, it looks cool.

I'm going over to Elena's house later to help her with her party setup and stuff. I think she's a little frazzled by it and I'll do my best to help her. I'll be the good boyfriend. Hopefully she'll do really well and make a lot of money selling Herbalife. I know for a fact, that its not for me, I'm no salesman, thats for sure, and I'm not comfortable talking to total strangers at all, especially about something like getting healthy or losing weight. I would think a lot of people would take offense to that, but thats just me. I'll help out behind the scenes and whatnot, but not on the frontlines.

Thats about it. Hopefully the boredom will pass and so will I tomorrow morning. I always worry about these things but I haven't failed one yet, knock on wood! Alright, I'm out.

Current music - Alanis Morissette "You Oughta Know"

Just thought I'd let everyone know that, just in case they were wondering. July 1st to be exact. Hard to imagine that the summer is flying by so fast and I really don't want to consider the girl I love is leaving for London, England towards the end of August, but thats another story.

Went to see Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle last night and it was pretty damn entertaining. Nothing fantastic, but, like the first one, definitely entertaining and the kind of movie you can just turn your brain off at and just sit back and enjoy and not worry that every single stunt they did was really impossible, but thats ok.

So far no word this morning if I will be working today, but if I don't, I'm sure I'll find someway to pass the time. Need to finish studying for my test so I can pass this sumbitch on Thursday and get my MCSA. I'll shutup about that now because I'm sick of saying MCSA and MCSE and Microsoft. I actually don't really like Microsoft that much. I love Apple as a matter of fact, I just work in the Windows world because thats where all the jobs are at, so I need to know my stuff. Plus, I'm good at it, both platforms. I'm bi-platform.

Can't think of anything else to say really. Need to go get in the shower and run an errand or two later in the afternoon, but thats about it. Who knows what I'm doing tonight, but I'm sure it involved hanging out with Elena. Tomorrow night is her big house party to get her business started so I'll be there supporting her. I may have even found her a customer. My parents bathroom and closets are being painted today and the head painter who must've recognized me from when they painted in February asked me if I lost weight. I said yeah, about 30 pounds. So, as I was exercising, the other guy came up to me and said if I had a minute could I tell him about my diet. I'm sure Elena will be ecstatic about it. I'll help in any way I can and feel comfortable about.

Alright, I'm out.

Current music - American Hi-Fi "Vertigo"